How can i open and say to the worl i do jave depression.. it just me or whennu say im depress people think u will suicide.. i dont have does suicide feeling.. i just dont feel any purpose in life.. have the most wonderful kid.. that give me so much joy in to my life… but still feel so empty inside… with not hope…
Feel like cant trust not one about how i feel.. cuz they can use it against me! Or treat me like im crazy…
I feel so lost in life…
2 Comments on “How to not get dip in depressions..”
Hi Lola,
We are really worried about you, and if you need someone to speak with we are here 24/7! Don’t go through this alone, give us a call at 1-866-728-7983. We want to be here to support you and listen to you.
– FKB
Lola:
It took me many years to be capable of trusting people. There *are* people out there who will understand exactly what you are going through! Almost 20 percent of adults in the United States alone suffer from depression. And no, it does not mean you are “crazy” or even that you have been, or ever will be, suicidal. I am a long term sufferer myself.
I personally believe that being open and honest is the best policy. Many people think that I am wrong about this- however, my thought is- that is how you learn who your friends truly are. And you will end up being surprised, even shocked, at how many of them are out there. Not all of these people suffer from depression themselves- they truly wish to understand what it is like for you. Some of them may have the wrong idea- such as everyone who is depressed suffers from suicidal ideation- remember, though, they get a lot of misinformation from movies and TV. They are not exposed to real-life people such as ourselves all the time. But because they are motivated to understand you, you can educate them in the facts.
For those who do not wish to understand, if that person is a potential friend, do you really need that person in your life? I prefer to surround myself with people who are compassionate and supportive.
It is unfortunate if that person who doesn’t understand is a family member. But even *they* can change. My Dad was always extremely hostile about my depressions. Then, suddenly, his attitude change completely. He said to me one day I was lucky to be alive with everything I had gone through in my life. I was shocked, although pleased-and quite frank really puzzled. What would make him change so much from my youth when he would scream at me to “snap out of it” when I was depressed? It turns out after I got married (to a man he adored), my husband got him alone and started speaking to him about it, and got through to him in a way that I could not. He also discovered my father had suffered from his own depressions- and was confused and too hard on himself for those-so he projected those feelings onto me.
In a nutshell- even those who do not understand can be motivated to change, and then go ahead and do so. My father wanted to listen to his son-in-law. That was his motivating factor. What is theirs, the ones in your life who may not understand?
Of course it will take you years to work up to this level of trust, especially if you have been rejected in the past. The thing that helped me the most was to join NAMI (National Association on Mental Illness). (www.nami.org) If you go to their meetings, (most cities and even very small town have a NAMI chapter) you will meet people who not only suffer from depression but their friends, family members, etc., who want to understand. You can also talk about how you are feeling yourself in a comfortable, non-judgmental, environment. It is really great for building trust because you will meet “normal” people there who do not think you are a freak! There are also many other free support groups for people. You can google to find them, or speak to the person at the number above- a lot of times folks on help lines know how to find support groups.
If you can’t (or are too shy, or uncomfortable) attending a support group, PLEASE call the number left for you above! In fact, I would suggest doing that before attending any support group- it is way easier to speak to someone on the phone in the beginning. The anonymity of a phone call helps you open up in ways that are not possible in person.
I guess that is what was on my mind. I hope it helps- it’s based on personal experience. Please, in any event, do
find someone to speak to- a therapist, a friend, someone on the phone. You are not alone.
DK