As unwanted and I know I was walking up to front door for the party at my older sisters today,I went not so much for the party as hoping for once my children wouldn’t be with their dad which I never get to hopeful for and if they hadn’t been there I wasn’t staying… Although it was not so of … Read More

How is it exactly that no one remember’s I exist except the kids they won’t let me see?… That is until days like today,  holidays everyone just has to keep reminding me that the best part is gone. .. My favorite part of me that made days like these and holidays so wonderful 😌 I miss my babies more and … Read More

It’s my sister’s birthday today.  i did not call her.  why should i?  she gives me crap all the time.  i don’t care about calling her.  i don’t care.

People crap on me daily.  tired of it. people don’t seem to care about my feelings.  Who gives a crap anyway?  I do my best daily. And people don’t care about me.  Forget her they say.  She’s the crazy one around here they say.  I am done and want to hide and forget life.  it’s crazy.  I am crazy I … Read More

I really don’t feel good anymore my batt I e ship has done gone and sunk the life saver was just a piece of candy and I the rock once sitting comfortably on deck am now somewhere embedded deep into the gravel of the darjest coldest loneliest part of the depths of my own ocean created from tear’s of confusion … Read More

Good Morning to you reading this… this is day 2 of my struggles.  It’s not a good day for me.  I can not seem to shake these feelings today.  My mind is in overload and my emotions are raw to the point that I can not breathe.  I feel as if I could break in half at any time.  These … Read More

I never thought trying to Bettermyself for my kids would turn our so fucked I’ve never felt more alone or unwanted. I had not missed out on any of them growing but now I can’t even go see them in not permitted to step in school grounds not even for performances which I had always been to nor can I … Read More

II don’t know how make it stop hurting or what I’m doing anymore and I don’t know why she’s such a bitch! I was a good mom why do they keep acting like I wasn’t 

Hello, this is the first time that I am putting my deepest thoughts and troubles out there for everyone to see.  I am a very private person, who has been battling Depression and Anxiety for several years and have always written my thoughts down on paper for my eyes only so this is a little difficult for me to sit … Read More

I finally told my Mom today that I was diagnosed with Depression, anxiety and stress disorder.  I was very hesitant to do so for all of these months that I have not been feeling well.  I have seen her look sad and say to me and siblings that I don’t look for her anymore or that I don’t answer her … Read More