It’s been going very well with therapist lately but one thing I’ve noticed is she makes suggestions about everything. While I appreciate it, not everything can be fixed. Nothing can fix or sell this horrible trailer my parents left me in alone. Nothing can fix the ocean and lack of citizenship between me and my partner other than money and … Read More

Ok let me apologize in advance for my spelling and punctuation. Sorry  I have always been the rock in my family. Even as a kid my sister’s leaned on me. Being the only boy I was there safe place. Then I got married and had kids and became the rock for my family. Fast forward to 4 years  ago my … Read More

I’ve been trying to get a therapist lately. I was trying to get a hold of my psychiatrist to ask him for recommendations on who a good therapist in the same facility would be that my medicare would cover. I hadn’t heard back for quite a while and so I called again yesterday. It turns out he’s no longer working. … Read More

I would pick Elvis. I love his velvety voice and I find it comforting and soothing. Elvis reminds me of childhood and my grandpa’s 8-track player.  My second pick would be Justin Furstenfeld from Blue October. I really admire his honesty and openness and how much her really seems to care about his family and fans. His music has really … Read More

Not sure if this is blog worthy but there’s been nothing for a while on here and this happened to me last night. There’s a piece of media I normally really enjoy. It’s not known for disturbing content. It’s colourful and light on story and usually not anything too serious. But last night something happened in it that really made … Read More

I feel it. I’m stuck now. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to go. Everything is so hazy now. I feel very little control over my future. I should probably just do whatever others say instead. I’m sick of making my own decisions if I’ll fail every time.

“Must be fluent in sarcasm.”  “Must have black hair and tattoos.”  “Must be able to take it as well as dish it out.”  “No, my pictures are NOT photoshopped.”  “High credit scores are a must.”  And my personal favorite: “Must have a fully-functioning, adequately-sized willy.” These are actual phrases that I come across on women’s dating profiles all the time. … Read More

I have been looking for something new to watch at night. I need to try to take a break away from some of the dramas I most often watch. I love some of them, but they are not always as relaxing as I probably need at times. Frankie and Grace (or Grace and Frankie… I always mix it up) is … Read More

I had plans to do some self-care this week but outside of my nightly meditation for sleep I fell short. Don’t get me wrong that counts and it’s probably one of the very few ways I can fall asleep but I’m trying to make an effort to do a tad more during the day. Sometimes life just eats up the … Read More

I’m back from vacation in the uk of spending time with my partner. I’m back to this horrible run down trailer. It’s still as horrible as ever. I’m still as alone here as ever. It will never be fixed. I will never be fixed. My disability money isn’t enough to move out. I only make about 800 a month and … Read More